The "R" Rated Adventures of Ming and Chi
Possible Penetration, more than turkey and the television
December 15, 2013
Ming here, checking in with you. I couldn't be happier with the way the site has turned out. If my brother can be the Jesus Christ of seatbelts, and save lives in turn, then maybe that is god's will. And I'm not a big GOD guy. Matter of fact I feel like God is like a parent I never talk to unless I really need something. I have found it convenient to have some form of higher power in my life though I feel like it's good to believe in something bigger than me, but each his own.
It's December 15th and we are ten days from the big scarecrow day. There is snow on the ground here in Idaho and I've been doing some shopping on Amazon. How cool is that shit? Kids may never know how good they have it. Remember when there was no Google? No YouTube? How different was the world then? I can remember thinking I was cool back when I had a pager. Then again, I was living off a girlfriend and using her bicycle as transportation. Glory Days! I'm not kidding, back then life was good too. I was living in downtown Sacramento, hustling up whatever work I could, just starting as a stagehand/loader. Since then I must have worked over a thousand gigs easy. It's definitely not as glamorous as you might think though to be working after the singer says "Thank you and goodnight!" Its been the best work I've known though.
I feel lucky as fuck that I got the chance to see the world with the tones, far be it from me to pull the nepotism card. On the Around the fur tour my brother Dai(Chi) used to say we were the two most miserable pricks on the road. I was trying hard not to drink, often failing miserably. Dai was having fun doing the shows, but found himself missing his wife and kid. Not to say we didn't have good times, we definitely did.
Care for a story?
It's Thanksgiving '97 and we had a day off. We were somewhere in the Midwest(hell could of been anywhere but Cali for all I know)and the band and some crew decided to go to a club and see some other band. We were drinking, but that almost goes without saying, and the guys from Snot were there too. I can;t remember if they were on tour with us, or maybe they were playing at that club too. When we got to the club, they had an extra room in the back and they kind of set us up with our own "Green room." They packed it with beer and we continued to drinking and smoking. There was some fat drunk guy going on about how good the headline band was. Being the asshole that I am I told him that said band sucked. Keep in mind I didn't even know who the band was. "If [said band] sucks tonight, I will kiss your ass," the drunk bellowed.
I immediately jumped up on the table and pulled my pants down.
"Pucker up and start kissing big boy," I yelled back. I didn't see it coming, it happened so fast, but he jabbed two fingers in the direction of my asshole. God it hurt, I wouldn't be surprised if there was some penetration. Well that didn't turn out like I was hoping. I was just fucking around.
Dai stepped up and told that asshole to beat it. We went in to see the healine band. I was standing right up front. They seemed to be some sort of nu metal band. The singer was black and had dreads and he was standing in some cockstar pose. There was no barricade so I reached up and grabbed his dick to fuck with him. I remember thinking, this guy;s not packing heat for a black dude. I don't remember spitting my beer on the band, but it was one of those nights. For those of you that don't know mw, I'm a real asshole when I drink. I don't know what it is, but around the time I started to black out, I really just want to cause trouble. I don't know if it's causing trouble so much as I just like to push people to the brink, to hell with the consequences. The world is a better, safer place now that I've quit.
We went back to the hotel. My brother went to sleep and the rest of the band and I packed into the tour manager's double suite. Some of the guys may have got on the white pony that night, I know I did. I went out to the balcony to have a smoke. We were about ten floors up. There was a roof top below, where the first floor and main lobby were. Suddenly I got an idea. I jumped back in the room and grabbed the television out of the entertainment center. It was still plugged in at this point.
Chino and Abe looked at me and were saying "no, don't do it." I looked over at Stef and he was nodding as in "hell yeah, let it fly." I ripped the tv out of the wall and took it to the balcony.
"Listen to this shit," I yelled.
Man it sounded like a bomb dropping.
In the morning I saw the tour manager haggling with the front desk people over the price of the tv.
Apparently, we had to confess to dropping it. I walked out towards the bus with my bags. Chino came walking towards me.
"You're lucky yesterday was Thanksgiving motherfucker," he said.
In the end, Stef split the cost of the tv with me. I think it was about two hundred bucks a piece. Also the band at the club that night was Sevendust, who I would eventually meet under better circumstances. A good bunch of guys, especially Clint.
Some stories you can share, some you save for the book, and some you take to the grave with you(hoping others will do the same).
It;s gonna be our first Christmas since Dai passed. At least I had him as a best friend for almost forty years. I am grateful for that. He made the world a better place and taught me, by example, how to be a better person. He wasn't perfect, but he was the best person I ever knew. He wasn't a Christian, but he was the most Christ like person I ever met.
Chino was right in general, I am lucky.
Enjoy the time we have together kids, good or bad, it goes by quick.
Happy Holidays, -M.